Jeanniecool pointed me to the Unitarian Jihad Name Generator, which was entertaining in its way, but it made me think that instead, I should be busily praying and reflecting on what choice I should make were the College of Cardinals to phone me up in a few days, to let me know that I had to choose a papal name.
Tell you what: “John Paul III” would be right out. Above and beyond theological differences, the comparisons would be unendurable; even as a tribute name, it wouldn’t work out. John XX would be an interesting option, rectifying the centuries-old confusion. I could signal my Dominican sympathies by choosing an OP-oriented name. . . . So much to consider, while keeping the phone line open. I sure hope Cardinal Ratzinger has my cell number; Si isn’t good on taking messages, and I’d hate to miss out on a history-making opportunity because an eighteen-year-old forgot to write down that a German theologian called.
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The best name suggestion I’ve seen floating around the web is Pope Suburban I…
Well, only a little less likely than the comment in a NYTimes editoral on Sunday– pointing out how good it would be if an African were elected, someone, it said, like Desmond Tutu. Seriously, that’s what the editorial suggested. Desond Tutu. A married pope whose daughter was a priest. Yes. That would be very good indeed.
XjohnX would have marketing appeal for young straight-edgers.
Pope with a sense of humor: Hilarius II. Too many people have forgotten about Hilarius I, pope from 461 to 468. Plus, the cardinals could dispense with the fancy smoke and just make the announcement on The Daily Show.