O-O-O-O-Okay

In response to my seeking competitive estimates for our relocation program, Margaret and I received the following emailed bid:

Dear Mr. Adam
 
On 7/14 our firm Sessum, Sessum & Sessum assessed the re-location needs at your residence in Durham, NC. This communication will provide an estimate of the time and materials required for your relocation to various destinations, domestically and internationally.
 
It is our understanding that items to be transported include those belonging to two sons in the midwest, a daughter in transit to Michigan, a wife in transit to Maryland, and yourself in transit to Scotland, Ireland or someplace like that. Items will be transported to these destinations from various locations, including Durham, NC, with miscellaneous items in Princeton, NJ, Chicago, IL, and possibly Maine.
 
Dayum!
 
Sorry.
 
You should know we’ve never encountered a move like this before. However, we are confident in our abilities to orchestrate it successfully.
 
We estimate approximately 3000 shipping containers and 33,022 man hours to complete the following:
Assembly of packing materials
Inventory and packing from 3 locations simultaneously
Loading and unloading
Driving, flying, transporting of household contents
We estimate time and materials at $17,500 for labor and materials for the above effort.
 
Given the trauma our firm has accumulated just from reviewing and assessing your needs, we are increasing our estimate by $30,000.
 
The total for the entire move is estimated at $47,500.
 
We hope you find this estimate acceptable, and look forward to helping your family through this very exciting and devastating transition.
 
Thank you!!
 
 
SS&S

Thank you, SS&S — for the offer, though probably not for the contract.

7 comments / Add your comment below

  1. I wish I could have been there in the office when they first started reviewing your needs.

    I concur with their assessment. When you put it that way… “Dayum” and “devastating” certainly seem to fit.

    A while back I compared your movements to those of a military family. I may have to amend that, as I have yet to meet a military family with a transition this… Complicated.

  2. A year’s salary for some of our divinity faculty, and some of the university faculty would need almost a year and a half–sounds reasonable.

    Mike

    PS–Did you make this up?

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